A Sink Named Phil

Imagine yourself in your living room, minding your own business, applying to jobs.

All of the sudden, a great growl comes from the depths of Hell...

What the...

You, as the honorable and courageous man you are, proceed to investigate.

Maybe an hour later, you finally determine that it is not in your bed, nor does it seem to want to enter your bed (thank God). You leave your soft fortress and proceed...

All is quiet for some time... until...

3 weeks later, near dying from starvation, you venture out into the kitchen to discover...

It's the kitchen sink...

And then you realize the uncanny resemblance kitchen sinks have to Lord of the Rings Ringwraiths...

"I will never go into the kitchen again. I will eat dust mites and lunchables." These first thoughts are your only hope in those initial moments of terror.

But, as with most things, once you give it a name, its scariness dwindles.

I chose to name him Phil.

Slowly but surely, the sink became less and less frightening, until at last it stopped demanding my firstborn and became quite the good friend of mine.

And even now, Phil the Sink makes random noises just to tell me how he's doing.

Hello, Phil.

Do you have talking inanimate objects? If so, PLEASE  SEEK IMMEDIATE PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION. Otherwise, feel free to comment below.