On Scams and Sadness

Hello! Yes, I am alive, and I’m sorry for the wait.

On Friday I had an interview with a well-known company for an Asset Protection position. Basically, I’d be someone who watches customers and employees and make sure than safety is observed and that merchandise is not stolen or damaged. 

So, I showed up for the interview at 4:30 as I was supposed to.

And waited.

And waited.

… and waited.

Twenty minutes later, I was FINALLY interviewed.

And, naturally, one of the issues that came up in the interview was as follows:

Huh.

Well, if that wasn’t a bait and switch, I don’t know what is. I mean, come on, who does that?

So anyways, he listed a few things that ultimately had nothing to do with what I wanted. And, on top of that, they were all sales position, that were seasonal, and “they’ll extend an offer if you work hard.”

I hate sales. And I also hate being essentially lied to. It sucks. But hey, I need money pretty badly. 

So… I guess I’ll just take it.

The interview proceeded and then ended, and I was invited to a second interview.

“Awesome, I suppose.” was my thought at that time. It was such a let down to go there and be told “oh, they thing we called you in for isn’t available, BUT YOU CAN DO THIS INSTEAD, RIGHT?”

I had such a feeling of “meh” I could’ve been a hipster. It was ridiculous.

But I need the money.

So, I agreed to show up yesterday (Monday), again at 4:30, to take a second interview.

And, again I showed up on time.

… and I waited.

See any similarities here?

“We’re very sorry, but we filled all of our positions. We’ll keep you on file, though!”

… seriously? What made this place think it could waste my time, effort, and gas money? It was really upsetting in the moment.

There are a TON of scams out there that are technically legal, but unethical as all get out.

"It's not child abuse if they do it to themselves."

It is absolutely terrible. So terrible, I’m gonna make an infographic about it.

Best infographic EVAR.

And the thing is that they paint this picture like it’s a fix-all when it’s really a make-your-life-shittier.

After all this bullshit, I sometimes need to take a break and remember that it will get better.

Unless, of course, it doesn’t.

 Know of any scams? Just want to rant? Comment about them below! I promise I'll reply!

Also, leave a comment with any number 1-5 to select which topic I'm writing about next!

Aggravation: The Musical

Today was a long day...

Wake up in th' morning, feelin' like a zombie

Grab my coffee, I'm out the door, gonna hit the city

Before I leave, check G-mail, and google maps too

'Cause when I leave for the day I know what I'm gonna do

I'm talkin'

Takin' that Civil Service

Tryin' to get a high score

Finally get a job, job...

~Ke$ha in an alternate universe, theoretically.

DEAR GOD, WHY.

How to Have a Long Ass Day

Step 1: Leave to go to your civil service exam and head towards the nearest gas station.

The dotted line means "fly here."

Step 2: Try your Luck at the Gas Pumps

Step 3: Leave the Gas Station with only $5.43 worth of fuel and drive like a maniac while keeping an eye on your fuel gauge

Step 4: Find a Gas Station, quickly fuel up, drive the rest of the 2 hour trip and arrive at the testing center...

... 10 minutes late...

Step 5: Drive BACK another 2 hours and bake some bread you've been planning for... and the dough is stickier than a toddler that discovered maple syrup.

Step 6: Preheat oven to 425? No problem!

Pictured above: Problem.

Gaaaaaaaah! Screw this, I'm being a Pirate.

Have any tremendously bad days that make you want to commit Omnicide? Or maybe you have a good story to cheer me up? Tell me about it in a comment below! 

Resumes, Cover Letters, and Dealing with Supreme Boredom

At the forefront of any job search is the Resumé, which is French for "this document will either propel you to stardom or doom you to ignominy."

This document is the front line in your battle out of poverty. You send them out like an army, one by one, every goddam day so that you can proceed forward toward employment. 

And, as mentioned elsewhere in this blog, they're mainly comprised of bullshit. 

While the resumé is necessary, it is sadly insufficient. Managers are people, too, and they're not just going to take a resume and say "oh, okay."

You need a tactical airstrike. Shock and Awe.

You need a cover letter.

Oh, not just one cover letter. Nope! You need one for every. damned. posting. you. apply to.

This leads to some bouts of insanity.

Okay, maybe a LOT of sanity.

You're never any fun, Phil.

But if you stick with it, and work hard, you'll finally get a response:

Well, there's always prison.

~TheBluCru